How to Reduce Fear and Increase Confidence in Sparring and Fighting

Hey. Ando here from Are you afraid to spar? Does the idea of being in a real fight
cause you fear? If your answer is no, then I’m not sure why
you clicked this video. But if your answer is yes, the idea of sparring or being a real fight makes you nervous, well, I think I can help. Let’s talk about real fights first. For me, the secret to controlling your fear
in a real fight is to make sure you’re only fighting for a worthy cause. A cause you’re willing to die for. If I see two dudes jump on my mother or my wife,
fear is not an issue. I will fight anybody to the death. Preferably, theirs. Now, that doesn’t make me special. I’m sure you would do the same thing. So, the big question is— if you’re not
afraid to fight for other people, then why are you afraid to fight for yourself? Don’t you believe you’re a cause worth
fighting for? If you don’t believe that your life is
worth defending, then we need to talk, my friend. Let’s meet up for some coffee and pie. But if you do believe your life is worth defending,
then there’s nothing to worry about. If you have to fight, you’ll fight. It’s only when we don’t have to fight,
or we’re not sure why we’re fighting, or we’re fighting for the wrong reasons,
that fear and confusion get in the way. So, get your priorities straight. The greater the cause, the sharper the claws. Okay. Now let’s talk about sparring. The general tip to reduce your fear of sparring
is to just keep sparring. Get in there. The more you spar, the less you’ll be afraid
of it. But let’s be honest–that tip sucks. You want a tip that’s going to help you out today,
right now, not a year from now. Well, good news–I’ve got one for you. When we start sparring, the main reason we
get scared is because we’re overwhelmed. We have no control over anything. I’m taking hits, I can’t see what’s
going on, and I have no idea how to stop the attack. Wait! Time out! Time out! Look—running and hiding are completely natural
reactions. So, if you find yourself curling up like a
baby when you spar, it’s okay. There’s nothing wrong with you. Of course, curling up like a baby is nothing
to be proud about, either, so let’s fix that. The trick is to give your brain something
to think about. For example, when you’re about to spar,
tell yourself to control your breathing. Don’t worry about punches or kicks. Just focus on breathing no matter what. Got that? Good. The next time you spar, tell yourself to keep your eyes
open. No matter what. No flinching. Try to see everything that’s happening. Once you got that, the next time you spar, tell yourself to keep your hands up and protect your head at all times, no matter what. Those would be the first three projects I’d recommend. Make sure you’re breathing, seeing, and protecting your head. Here’s the big idea— you can’t improve
everything at the same time. There are just too many skills to work on. Your brain is terrible at multitasking, but
it’s incredibly powerful when you focus it on one skill at a time. If you don’t do that, if you don’t keep
the reins tight, then your brain is free to just run wild and react to anything that gets thrown at it. That’ll get you killed. So, approach your sparring like a meditation. The kind of meditation where you stare at
a candle or you just listen to a bell. Put your full attention on one skill at a time. Remember this—the more you control something,
the less you’ll fear everything. Once you can breathe, see, and protect
yourself, then you can add and technique and tactic you want. One at a time. Maybe you spend the whole class just working
on your jab. Or maybe you work on your footwork to stay from your partner’s power hand. Or maybe you want to set up a fancy combination
that makes you happy. Whatever. The moves are up to you, but the principle
stays the same— give your brain one thing to thing about. If you do that, that’s the fastest way to build good habits
and true confidence. If you like that tip, hey–don’t be afraid,
hit subscribe. And to keep up with everything I’m doing,
find the link to sign up for my free email updates list. Until next time, hey–you’re worth fighting
for, so keep fighting for a happy life.

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